There is a heaviness
On her chest
In her heart
Throughout her breathing passage
It blocks her breath
It tightens her lungs
It makes her dizzy
And in that heaviness
There are cracks
That are causing the universe inside her to crumble
It’s like there’s nothing to grab on to
There is no number to dialNo one to answer
So that she can unravel into the receiver
To cry
To bare her soul
To say “I’m so scared”
To say “I need a hug”
So she feels the weight
Of her Shame
The world’s Intolerance
The Strength of others
Impossible strength
Belonging to the voicesTelling her
“Hold it inside”
“Hold it together”
“Hold it in Hannah”But it doesn’t empower herThe words are shattering her foundation
The cracks rumble with the walls of her run down house
And the windows shake and the walls crumble
And she is homelessAnd she is not whole
But how can anyone remain whole Standing in a pile of rubbleHolding the broken pieces of their insides in the palms of their hands.The pieces – that when put back together are only who she is pretending to be.

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